A Defeat

A defeat happens when you don’t reach you goal or what you want to reach. After my first big defeat I see a defeat at something horrible and something it wouldn’t happen to me. I have always been a competitive kid. When I was a little kid I always want to win because for me loosing was one of the most horrible things and something I would prevent all my life. Since my first years school I was competitive, I always try to win in little contest that put my teachers like the first to finish a puzzle, the fastest in the class, or the best drawing. I only was thinking in not to loose.

When I have 6 years almost 7years I start going to Karate, I start with little kid trainings but what I really wants is to be a great champion. I was white belt and my dream was to have my black belt and fight with the best. The color of belt indicates your experience in karate. The order is white, yellow, orange, purple, blue, green, brown, and finally black. You have something call “the grade” that is a level in the middle of each color and it represents with a black line across the belt.

After 3 months in Karate I had my first tournament, I was very anxious and happy expecting to compete with kids like me, kids that just start. When my category was going to start I look at m competitors and they were yellow and orange belt I was nervous but very anxious. I reach the final but I loose and get 2^nd place, I get my first trophy so I was happy and I feel like if I win.

After 3 years of hard training I get an opportunity to be in a karate circuit in witch the one with more points in the year will become world champion in the respective category. I win 3 years in a row and I was with the thought that I would never loose. After those 3 years I was in my road to winning the 4^th and it was near the biggest tournament in Guatemala, the one with more points. The day before the tournament I had my first 15 party so I had a good time and I was thinking that I had enough strength for the tournament.

The day of the tournament I was a little nervous but I had a lot of confidence. My first 2 fights were great, in the third one I was feeling that my legs were tired and with less strength. After 5 fights I reach the semifinal, it was against a Salvador competitor, so if I win I will reach the final and I will had been the champion again with more points. I start winning the fight but after 2 minutes I was very exhausted, I look to the point table and I was loosing, I was starting to have a feeling of desperation and anger. After 2 and a half minutes I was losing by one point, but I was very tired and I it was very difficult to resist the half a minute that was missing. I was starting to feel a great desperation to win and in the last second I put all my strength and effort to go through my rival and try to make a point, the time was over and the judges make the last cal to see if I make the point, but this time was not my turn to win, the judges doesn’t give any point. When I loose I experience a lot of emotions I felt angry, desperation, sadness and I felt that I disappoint my professor and my dad. I didn’t know what to do or how to reaction. I win third place but I don’t get the amount of points to be the world champion again.

I felt defeated. I only want to go home to train to be better because I felt I wasn’t good enough. I was scared to look to my professor and scared that he would find out that I didn’t win. I also was scared of what my dad would think, because I was used to hear from my father that he was proud that I won and the go to eat and see the fight that he recorded. I also want to grab the camera to erase the video. But when I look at my dad he hug me and tell me: good fight you are the best fighter I ever seen, the next one would be.    Since that day I learn a lot, now I know that I would not win always. That you also fall sometimes but you can choose to stay there or the get up. I learn a lot from that fight. My dad and I see the video and look what I can improve. I learn that you learn more when you loose than when you win. Now for me a defeat doesn’t exist, because I can loose but if I get up I would always be a winner